


uncharted

by syncxpate



Category: SHINee
Genre: Angst, Emotional, Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, M/M, Multi, Polyamory, girl!Key, i feel like i should say sorry for this haha, jongkey!centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-27
Updated: 2019-07-27
Packaged: 2020-07-23 00:01:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 19,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20000659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/syncxpate/pseuds/syncxpate
Summary: jonghyun is polyamorous and gwiboon is not, and that isn't a problem until he meets taemin.





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> if you recognise this (unlikely but), i posted this in 2016/2017 (?) on my now deleted tumblr. today i was reorganising my google drive, found it again, edited a bit and thought hey, why not post it again? 
> 
> this was a result of spending way too much time researching whether a monogamous person can be in a relationship with a polyamorous person, was meant to be a 800 word fic at most and became...this.
> 
> if i got anything wrong, please let me know, i have zero qualms being corrected (nicely haha)  
> but yeah writing this was an interesting experience.
> 
> first 2 parts are very jonggwi/jongtae centric, part 3 shifts to be more 2min/onho/ontae.

‘you’ll need to repeat that for me slowly.’

jonghyun is saying a lot of words that gwiboon knows aren’t meant to hurt but it feels a little bit like he’s using her chest as a dartboard anyway. he looks so soft under the yellow light, and the shadows that always linger under his eyes are more faded today. she watches the way his mouth forms over the syllables and thinks about reaching over the pressing his lips shut with her finger and thumb, or maybe her own mouth, but that’s unfair, and gwiboon is working very hard on not being unfair.

‘so what do you think?’ jonghyun asks finally, eyes peering at her timidly from under his fringe. so cute, she thinks. so innocent, like he hadn’t just spent 15 minutes explaining to her that he would like to also be with this other person, who he’d met at work, like the words hadn’t been made her feel like she’d been sucker punched.

 _i think i’m a fool_ is what she doesn’t say, because she has always known he’s polyamorous. it just never mattered before. 

idiot girl, her mother’s caustic voice whispers in her head.

for five years, it had just been them. five years where despite the amount of flirting that jonghyun did, he never really cared enough about anyone else. a very small part of her had hoped it could remain that way, that maybe despite how he was wired, no one else would interest him, that it would always be just them. she should have known, should have considered this before starting, should have said no when he asked her out that first time, should have taken the escape hatch when he told her at date number three, should never have given her heart over.

jonghyun is still looking at her with those limpid, liquid, beautiful eyes, and she knows despite all those should’s, she still would never have given him up.

‘i think,’ she says, breathing out. ‘i need to be alone for awhile.’

‘okay,’ he answers. ‘okay.’ he looks too much like an admonished pet, so just before she leaves the room she reaches over and tugs him into a hug; and when his arms settle around her waist, she kisses his shoulder and wonders why she had fallen in love like this.

****

⁂

****

‘hey,’ he whispers, pushing open their room door. ‘i know you said you needed to be alone, but you’ve been in here an hour. and i was worried.’ 

gwiboon looks up at him from where she has curled up in the corner of their bed; he’s got furrows between his eyebrows and anxiety heavy in his gaze and her heart twists sharply in her chest.

‘come here, you baby,’ she says, reaching out.

when his comforting weight is draped around her, she snuggles in and sighs. 

‘this...taemin person,’ she begins, tracing idle patterns on his chest, intending to ask about them, intending to learn more. then she stops, because she can feel nausea using her throat like the rungs of a ladder.

‘i love you,’ she says instead. ‘and i _know_ you love me and aren’t replacing me. but it still feels a little bit like that. like i’m not enough, or you don’t love me anymore.’

jonghyun brushes his lips across her forehead. ‘i’ve loved you for five years,’ he says gently. ‘and i would like to love you for the next five hundred if possible. but i think i can love taemin too, and i want to try.’

‘i want to say i don’t want you to do it,’ she tells him bluntly, and he recoils.

‘but,’ she continues, stroking the side of his face. ‘that’s not fair. i just, i need time to figure this out.’

‘do you want to meet them?’ jonghyun asks. ‘will that help?’

‘meet the competition?’ she asks back, only half joking.

‘they're not competition,’ jonghyun rebukes gently.

‘i know,’ she says. ‘it just feels like that right now.

they both lie quietly for a while, the room only filled with the sound of their breathing. 

‘okay,’ she says, a little while later. ‘i’ll meet taemin.’

jonghyun beams at her. ‘thank you,’ he says.

****

⁂

taemin is tall and slim, broad shouldered and long legged, and their face is exceptionally beautiful. gwiboon feels like dirt caught in the treads of a sports shoe sole in comparison.

until taemin looks up at her and gapes. ‘holy shit,’ they exclaim. ‘you’re gorgeous.’

gwiboon can feel blood rush to her face. ‘jjong has good taste,’ she says airily. and when taemin laughs, she laughs too. it’s a good disguise for the scream that’s threatening to catapult out of her mouth as jonghyun steers taemin to their dining room, fingers pressed to their lower back, and taemin looks back with a soft grin, leaning in close to whisper.

she doesn’t realize she hasn’t moved from her position by the front door until jonghyun comes back out to look for her.

‘baby?’ he whispers.

‘taemin’s really beautiful,’ she says, not meaning to sound quite so hollow.

‘oh baby,’ jonghyun says softly, understanding what she’s not saying. and he pulls her into a hug.

taemin’s face is cautious when jonghyun leads gwiboon into the dining room. ‘are you okay?’ they ask. 

and gwiboon thinks it prudent to admit her fears. 'no,' she says honestly. 'but i want to be.'

she almost expects taemin to sneer at her insecurities, or to roll their eyes. but taemin smiles, a brilliant one, and turns to jonghyun. 'i like her!' he declares.

'most people do,' jonghyun replies. 

he turns to look at gwiboon, tender smile on his mouth, and there is an answering one that lights upon gwiboon's lips. it's very faint, almost falling off the edges of her mouth, but it's there.

⁂

****

it's exactly 7:43pm on a wednesday when gwiboon calls minho. 

'he's out with taemin today,' she wails at him without preamble, when he picks up. 

'wait, what,' minho says.

'he's out with taemin and i'm all alone at home and it's been a month and a half and i've been trying so hard to be a nice person. i'm a nice person, right? ming?' there are very few moments in time that he's seen gwiboon like this. it scares him.

'gwi,' minho says calmly. 'you're not making a lot of sense.'

'taemin is _so pretty_ ,' gwiboon says, voice reaching into the higher ranges of pitch. 'they're so pretty and jjong is out with them, probably kissing or more, and i'm here thinking about it and _my boyfriend is out with his other partner._ how did this happen to me?'

'you've always known he's polyamorous, gwi,' minho tells her soothingly, finally catching on.

'i _know_ ,' gwiboon says. 'but knowing it in my head isn't the same as knowing it in my heart and it _hurts_. i've been trying, ming, i really have. i love him so much.'

'have you told jonghyun all of this?' minho asks.

' _no_ , are you insane? i've been trying to be understanding about this because i know it's his nature and not something he wants to hurt me with. if i tell him, _he's going to leave me_ . because it's been a month and a half and i should be _okay with this._ did i tell you we made a list of rules and stuff? and it felt so surreal! what am i doing? but i love him, and taemin is so sweet, and i should be _okay with this._ ' gwiboon's voice has stretched up into the realms that make minho's ears hurt.

'do you want me to go over?' minho asks. 

'no,' gwiboon mutters. 'that's ridiculous. i'm not that weak.'

'i'm going over,' minho announces. 'i'll be there in 20 minutes.'

'okay,' gwiboon says in a tiny voice.

****

⁂

the gwiboon that opens the door to minho is very different from how she usually presents herself to the world. this gwiboon has hooded, red eyes, and tear streaked cheeks. she's dressed in crumpled clothes; and her typically sleek red hair is pulled into a messy ponytail to the side of her head. 

'hi,' she says mournfully.

'aren't you looking glamourous,' minho quips, hoping to get a smile to light on her face. instead her mouth droops even lower. 

'do you think if i were more glamourous,' she starts. 'jjong wouldn't need someone else?'

'gwi,' minho rebukes softly. 'you know it's nothing to do with you. it's just how he's made. you're not being fair to him now, either.'

'how can you be so understanding of this?' gwiboon complains, as minho pushes into the house to pull her into a hug. 'it's not like _you're_ polyamorous.'

she stops, and peers up at him. 'are you?'

minho snorts. 'like being a gay asexual is not complicated enough?' he says, shaking his head fondly. he picks her up and carries her to the sofa, and lets her curl into his lap. 

'you need to talk to him, you know,' he tells her, rubbing gentle circles into her back. 

'i'm scared,' she says honestly, her voice muffled in the cloth of his shirt. 'what if he decides i'm being too difficult and leaves me?'

'jonghyun _loves you_ ,' minho tells her. 'he'll listen, and he'll stay.'

'plus,' he continues. 'you're so demanding on a general basis, and he's already stuck around for five years, so i'm pretty sure this won't be the last straw.'

when this elicits a smothered laugh from gwiboon, minho smiles, taking it as a victory. 

'i love him so much,' gwiboon says, voice pensive. 'but sometimes i don't know if i can do this.' and when she starts to sob softly into his shirt, minho just wraps his arms around her and lets her cry.

⁂

he doesn’t realize just how long they stay like that until the sound of a key in the door. when he looks up, jonghyun is pushing open the door, small smile on his mouth. the smile lingers until jonghyun’s head rises, and he slowly becomes aware of gwiboon sleeping in minho’s arms, and then it turns lopsided and tumbles slowly off his lips.  
  
'hey,’ jonghyun says cordially, eyes focussed on gwiboon’s prone figure.  
  
minho inclines his head in greeting, wary of waking gwiboon up. they’re not the closest of friends; being gwiboon’s best friend doesn’t quite mean that he’s jonghyun’s.  
  
'not to be rude,’ jonghyun says pointedly. 'but what are you doing here?’  
  
'she called me,’ minho replies, shrugging.  
  
'is she okay?’ jonghyun whispers, coming closer.  
  
'i think you need to talk to her about that,’ minho says. jonghyun nods slowly.

a faint sound from gwiboon makes them both stop talking. 'jjong?' gwiboon says, her voice hoarse. 'you're home?' she stands up and reaches out her arms for him and he closes arms around her. 'how's taemin?'

jonghyun bites back a smile. 'they're great,' he says. then he adds quietly. 'are you?'

gwiboon's breath catches at the words. 'i wasn't, for a while,' she says. she glances at minho from the corner of her eyes. 'but i think i will be? i'm trying anyway.' her fingers clench into the material of jonghyun's shirt. 

'don't force yourself,' jonghyun whispers huskily. 'it's okay not to be okay.'

'i love you,' gwiboon says. 

'i know,' jonghyun replies, hands tightening around her waist. 'i love you too.'

minho smiles, and lets himself silently out the door. there's still a long way to go, but a small part of him is sure they'll be okay.

⁂

gwiboon looks exhausted, and jonghyun wonders how long she’s looked like that, like part of her soul is crumbling away. when she had willingly sat down with him and taemin to set up the rules and structure, he’d thought it would be okay, that she had taken it in her stride, the way she did with most things. but maybe all that had been was her deciding to put up another front.

taemin had asked him point-blank just the other day, had asked him if he was really sure about gwiboon’s feelings about this, about their relationship, about jonghyun spending time with them. ‘she’s mono,’ they had said, like maybe gwiboon was afflicted with a terminal disease. ‘mono people are fundamentally different. she might really want to try but don’t overlook it if she’s struggling.’ and jonghyun had been sure, so sure he knew gwiboon well enough to be able to tell. funny how it had taken walking in to her sleeping in another man’s arms to realize that maybe he didn’t really know her well enough.

‘why did you call minho over?’ jonghyun asks gently. and he can’t help noticing the way her shoulders tense and she averts her eyes.  
  
‘it’s nothing,’ she says. ‘and i didn’t call him over. i just called him; he’s the one who decided to come over.’  
  
‘okay, so what did you call him for?’  
  
‘nothing,’ gwiboon repeats. ‘nothing, nothing. it’s not important. we figured it out, i’m fine now. what did you do with taemin today?’ she’s grasping at straws and changing the subject, and the waver of her voice throws a shade of a lie over her words.  
  
'we’re not talking about taemin and me,’ jonghyun says, steering her to the dining table. 'we’re talking about you and me.’

the look that gwiboon throws at jonghyun is lit up with shock. 'why do we have to talk about that?’ she says, shaky smile curling over her lips. 'there’s nothing wrong. right? nothing.’  
  
jonghyun brings his hands up to cup gwiboon’s face. 'baby,’ he asks. 'what are you so scared of?’  
  
'nothing,’ gwiboon repeats again, hanging on to the word like a drowning woman to the last floating object. 'nothing. i’m not scared. can we not talk about this?’ her hands are trembling; she’s never really been able to directly lie to him.  
  
'gwi,’ jonghyun says sternly. 'please stop it.’ he silently curses his preoccupation with building a new relationship with taemin, for letting himself get too distracted to pay enough attention and seen this earlier. neglect had never been in the plans.

the pressure in the silence and jonghyun's worried stare must crack something in gwiboon's rigid armour. 'i’m sorry,’ she blurts out. 'i know it’s not something cruel you’re doing to hurt me. but it’s so hard, and i was lonely today. so i called ming, just to cry a bit. sometimes i don’t know how to do this, but i’m trying. please don’t leave me.’ the words stream out in one uninterrupted breath, and she closes her eyes after, as if afraid to see the consequences.  
  
there’s a desperate pain in jonghyun’s chest at her reaction and words. had he really made her feel like she couldn’t express her discomfort at this? made her think that he would leave her at the slightest indication that she wasn’t immediately able to handle this new development? 'baby,’ he says, voice trailing away, the endearment the only thing he can voice. she peers at him from behind her lashes, worry still stark against her skin.  
  
'i’m not leaving you unless you want me to,’ he says, finally. 'this is new for me too, and obviously i’ll need to learn how to balance time better. i’m sorry, i’ve made you feel abandoned, haven’t i?’  
  
the large gulp of air that gwiboon sucks in is followed too closely by a wave of tears. 'i just, i miss you,’ she gasps out. 'you’re out with taemin a lot, and i get that, it’s a new relationship. i really want you to be happy, but it’s terribly surreal and there’s no manual for this and some days all i can think is i’m losing you.’  
  
she looks straight at him. 'i love you so much, you know? but this sometimes makes me feel like you don’t love me, and it’s irrational, but there it is.'  
  
'i’m sorry,’ she says again.  
  
the words taemin had said too casually earlier float to the front of jonghyun’s mind. 'honestly, i think she’s a little crazy to stay with you. insecurity when you’re both poly is already hard to deal with; i can’t imagine how much worse it has to be for her. she’s gorgeous, she could get any guy she wanted. and yet she picks you. i'm not sure if i call this admirable or really dumb.’ they hadn’t given jonghyun a chance to answer, picking at their food and spinning a tale about another instance they had been to the same place, and jonghyun hadn’t thought very much about it either, just let himself smile a bit at the idea of gwiboon choosing him above all the other men who had tried for her heart. but now, it seems like taemin had been far more astute with regards to gwiboon’s fragility than jonghyun had been.  
  
his hands fall away from gwiboon’s face and down to her waist and he pulls her towards him, settling her on his lap, her legs dangling on either side on his thighs. her arms instinctively drape around his neck. the surprised squeak she exhales makes him smile a little, and he’s gratified when a tiny answering smile lands on her mouth. 'there’s nothing for you to apologize for,’ he whispers. 'nothing at all. i should have paid more attention. i should have realized you weren’t dealing. but i liked thinking we had it figured out. i’m sorry it took you calling minho for me to realize. even taemin noticed before i did.’  
  
gwiboon sniffles and scoots closer to him. 'it’s okay not to be okay,’ jonghyun coos, his hands slide up and down in a comforting rhythm along gwiboon’s back. 'we’ll figure this out, we’ll make this work.’  
  
'i love you,’ gwiboon says again, voice tripping over the words. 'so much. i don’t want this to fall apart.’  
  
'it won’t,’ jonghyun says, and the promise tastes sweet on his tongue. 'i won’t let it. we both won’t.’

****

the smile that unfurls across her face is the realest one he's seen in weeks, and as she leans down to press their lips together, he kisses back with enthusiasm. he tells himself he'll do everything he can to show her he loves her still, loves her plenty, loves her true.

****

~-~

****

gwiboon is pulled out of the crime novel she had been reading in too dim light and too close to her face by repeated whispers of her name. 'oh,' she says when her brain readjusts to normal life, smiling up at jonghyun. 'hi.'

****

'how many times have i told you not to read with the lights off?' jonghyun chides gently, flipping the switch to bathe the room in white light.

****

'i started before it got dark,' gwiboon defends herself.

****

'and then it got exciting, so you decided it was okay to read by the street lamp through the window instead of getting up to turn on the light.' jonghyun completes her sentence.

****

he taps the spectacles perched on her nose. 'i thought you hated these,' he says. 'why are you so determined to make your eyesight worse?'

****

gwiboon opens her mouth to disagree and argue but is struck dumb when she registers the presence of taemin standing quietly behind her boyfriend. 'hi,' she says to them, waving her hand stiffly, getting an equally awkward one in response. she turns her gaze onto jonghyun, mutely requesting the reason for taemin's presence.

****

'taemin wants to ask you something,' jonghyun says, grinning at her. 'be good.'

****

'i'm always good,' gwiboon says, pouting.

****

jonghyun shakes his head and laughs lightly, before leaning down to kiss away the pout. 'seriously,' he says, voice earnest. 'be nice.' she rolls her eyes and ruffles his hair. 'i promise,' she says.

****

he turns to taemin and kisses them too, then exits the room, leaving the door slightly ajar. gwiboon sees taemin smile into the kiss and tells herself that with practise it will be easier to breathe through her partially cracked heart.

****

sighing heavily, gwiboon heaves herself out of the chair with graceless reluctance. taemin is still standing calmly near the door, their eyes tracing her movements as she finds a bookmark and replaces the book on its proper shelf. 

****

'do you think jonghyun left the door open in case we decided to kill each other?' they ask, as soon as gwiboon turns back from the bookshelf.

****

'more afraid i'd kill you out of jealousy,' gwiboon quips. that the sentence is closer to reality than she is comfortable with is what she doesn't say.

****

'could you really?' taemin asks, tone serious. their eyes trace the thinness and delicacy of gwiboon's figure, honest question in the gaze.

****

'i did taekwondo,' gwiboon says, shrugging. 'so i suppose i could, if i wanted to.'

****

the raised eyebrow and approving nod ought to have been insulting but on taemin it looks like admiration, and gwiboon decides to take it as it is. 'what did you want to ask me?' she questions, remembering what jonghyun had said.

****

'oh,' taemin's eyes flicker around the room, taking in the overcrowded bookshelves, the scented candles lining side table, the framed artworks hanging on the walls, the queen sized bed that gwiboon gingerly sits on. they seem scared, very different from the self composed, confident person that gwiboon has almost gotten used to seeing. 'i was wondering if you want to hang out?' they ask. 'just me and you, i think it would help.'

****

'you,' they qualify, when gwiboon doesn't answer. 'help _you_.'

****

'help..me?' gwiboon thinks maybe she should feel offended, that her boyfriend's partner has to pander to her difficulties in accepting her own relationship. 

****

'if you get to know me,' taemin says. 'maybe it'll be easier to accept me as jonghyun's partner.' gwiboon stares at them quietly, letting the words sink into her mind.

****

'of course,' they continue gently. 'it could make everything worse, but right now, i think there's no harm. it's useless to just keep telling yourself you'll just get used to it. these things don't happen on their own. it isn't magic.'

****

gwiboon wants to laugh at the request, wants to fling a few candles at taemin at jonghyun at the walls of their home. she feels like overblown glass, just one step away from shattering. taemin means well, she knows that, she can see that, but she doesn't quite know how to accept it. taemin's gaze is too piercing, almost like they know exactly what's going on in her head, and she has to close her eyes to block them out, block everything out.

****

_i'm polyamorous, jonghyun said._

****

_what does that mean? gwiboon asked._

****

_it means, he said, gazing at her with his big honest eyes. it means i can be in love with more than one person at once. it means i might want to have multiple relationships at once. it means that this will likely not be exclusive._

****

_oh, gwiboon breathed out. oh._

****

_think about it, jonghyun said, and his smile had been bordering on sad. there isn't anyone else right now, but there might be. and you need to be okay with it, before we get serious._

****

she told him it was okay, she told him she could handle it. but theory is different from practice right? she had been living on the theory of jonghyun being polyamorous, but had let a fragment of herself forget, and when taemin came in, she realized that the reality of living with it was not the same as imagining it, that knowing something at the cerebral level is so much different from seeing it with your own eyes; watching your boyfriend nuzzle into someone else, laugh into someone else's skin, go on dates with someone else. she can't pretend taemin doesn't exist, she can't pretend jonghyun isn't what he is, and equally she cannot object to him merely living the way he is built. she can only learn to live with it, learn to figure out how to numb the pain in her heart, learn to ice over the jealousy, learn to breathe through the pain, live and hope that one day she'll wake up and be okay with it. and over and over the question repeats _can you really live like this?_

****

is love enough?

****

when she opens her eyes, taemin is still looking at her, sympathy in their eyes.

****

'i dated a monogamous person once,' they tell her, voice singsong and faraway. 'i was already with my long term partner then. he said he was okay with it, said he loved me enough.'

****

the gaze that glances over gwiboon's skin is direct and perceptive. 'eventually,' they continued. 'love wasn't enough. he loved me, and i loved him. but what i am wasn't something he could truly understand or accept. we split on relatively good terms.'

****

they take in a slow breath. 'i didn't expect to be telling you this now. but, here is how it stands; i want to be with jonghyun. and jonghyun wants to be with me. and i really hope it lasts. he wants to be with you too, and you...he's too worried about you, and it's spoiling things. for him, for me, for you. gwiboon, pretending it's not real won't change the facts, pretending you're fine won't make you fine. are you really sure this is what you want?'

****

the words are calm, steady and so kind, and gwiboon feels something like reluctant gratitude twist in her heart. in another world, she would have accused taemin of discouraging her so that they could steal jonghyun for themself. but that isn't how it works in this kind of relationship, in the world she now inhabits, in this complex relationship she honestly never expected to find herself in. despite everything she had known in her head about jonghyun. 

****

'no,' she admits. 'i'm _not_ sure. i haven't been sure since the first time i met you, four months ago. and i'm still not sure now. it feels like i'm betraying him, that i cannot slide into this arrangement as easily as he would like. but it still feels like _he's_ betraying me, by also loving you.'

****

'i love him,' gwiboon tells taemin and taemin nods, their little smile seemingly saying _i know_. 'that is a fact i cannot escape. but you're right, sometimes it just might not be enough.'

****

'what are you going to do now?' taemin asks, as gwiboon falls silent.

****

'i don't know,' gwiboon says quietly. 'i need to think.'

****

'thank you,' she says after a beat. 'i didn't know but i needed those words.'

****

'you're welcome,' taemin says easily. 'oh and let me know if you ever really want to hang out.'

****

gwiboon's smile feels a little easier on her mouth. 'jonghyun put you up to this, didn't he?'

****

'yes,' taemin says airily. 'our boyfriend is just concerned.'

****

_our boyfriend._ gwiboon's smile fades again as the words pierce her consciousness. taemin's sharp gaze misses nothing. 

****

'living in pain is not the healthiest way to live,' taemin says softly. 'just think about it.'

****

as the door shuts behind them, gwiboon falls back into the mattress. she feels a little bit like crying again, like the shelter of her denial has shattered. this isn't a phase she has to push through, this is reality; her life, his life, and somehow she has to find out if she can really live like this.

****

~-~

****

as taemin steps back into the hall, jonghyun looks up from the newsletter he had been idly flipping through. 'hey,' he says. 'how did it go?' 

****

taemin shrugs, settling down next to him on the couch. 'she didn't give me a straight answer,' they say. 'but i expected that.' 

****

jonghyun sighs, leaning his cheek into taemin's shoulder. 'what do i do?' he asks, quiet despair etched into the words. 

****

'i don't know,' taemin whispers, running their hand through jonghyun's hair. 

****

what gwiboon wants is taemin to disappear, and what taemin wants is to stay. they wonder if maybe jonghyun would want taemin to disappear too, if the alternative option is losing gwiboon. they wonder why monogamy always has to push forward such an ultimatum. 

****

when they had first met gwiboon, they thought maybe it would be easy, that maybe the fact that she was monogamous wouldn't be as much of an obstacle as they first thought. she had been open and honest, and they had thought maybe she would be able to cope. that ultimately she couldn't and still hasn't is not surprising. disappointing, and for jonghyun, heartrending, but not surprising.

****

jonghyun scoots closer to taemin, curling an arm around their waist, dropping a kiss into the side of their neck, and taemin sighs into his hair, arms tightening around him. 'i like you a lot,' they tell him. and jonghyun hums, lips still pressed against taemin's skin.

****

'i like you a lot too,' he replies.

****

'stay awhile longer?' jonghyun asks. and taemin lets their lips lift into a smile. 

****

~-~

****

when the door creaks open and gwiboon peeks her head out, jonghyun unfolds himself from taemin. 'hey,' he says softly. 'you okay?' he reaches out an arm to her, but it stiffens and drops when her body follows her head through the door and he notices the duffle bag clenched in her hand. 

****

'baby?' he whispers. his eyes widening slowly. 'where are you going?' there's something almost like fear circling the syllables of his words. 

****

'i'm-,' gwiboon starts, eyes flickering in between the floor and jonghyun's face. her body is trembling slightly, like a shivering arrow slung into a bow. she sucks in a desperate breath. 'i'm going to stay with minho for a while,' she says. 'he's coming in a few minutes.'

****

'you're leaving me?' jonghyun asks, taut tension lashed across his voice. 

****

'no!' gwiboon says, voice almost a shout. 'i'm not, i just- i need to…' her eyes rise to finally meet jonghyun's. 'i'm sorry,' she says finally. 'i'm sorry, i'm sorry.'

****

jonghyun is still, too still, still as if his entire body has lost its ability to move. 'gwi,' he says again. 'please talk to me.' he finally moves in her direction and she darts away. his responding flinch looks like betrayal.

****

'i need...to think,' she says. 'i just..i need, to not be here, not to see…' she waves at the room, at taemin still sitting on the couch, at jonghyun. 'i need to _think_ . and i can't think, with you here. i can't...i need to- i'm _sorry_.' 

****

the apology has barely fallen from her lips before she's barreling towards the door, intent clear in her face. and taemin rises and runs after her, stopping her at the door. they can see jonghyun just over her shoulder, confusion turning into misery, and it stabs rage through their chest. 

****

'why are you running away?' they hiss at gwiboon.

****

'i'm not,' gwiboon insists, and then her voice loses its intensity. 'take care of him, please.' 

****

before she can move past them, taemin grabs her wrist. 'explain what you're doing. explain to me, at least. because you didn't explain to him.' they look beyond gwiboon again, at jonghyun who's staring at them like the very sight is chipping holes in the center of his soul. 'you owe him an explanation, and if you won't give him one to his face, you'll give it to me.'

****

letting out a whoosh of breath, gwiboon shuts her eyes tight, as if to gather herself. when she opens them again, there is surety in her gaze. 'i need to leave, to think about this relationship. you said it too, sometimes love just isn't enough. and i love him, but i need to _know_ , if it's enough. if you being here long term is something i am willing to try to live with. not just at lipservice.'

****

'why is getting away something that is necessary then?' taemin questions. 'isn't it more reasonable to stay here and try, than to run away and imagine up scenarios you don't even know are real?'

****

'i need to think,' gwiboon repeats. 'without him there. i need to know this is _my_ decision and not one i'm just going along with so i won't lose him. because that...will make me hate him, and i don't want to hate him.'

****

there is truth in her words that taemin doesn't know how to rebut. 'why couldn't you tell him this?'

****

'what couldn't you tell me?' jonghyun's voice interrupts, coming up from behind gwiboon. and when he puts a hand on her shoulder, she stiffens, almost imperceptible, but something jonghyun definitely felt. his eyebrows wrinkle together and taemin wants to laugh. that gwiboon seems incapable of openly communicating with the man she loves most is somewhat of a tragic, unhumourous joke.

****

gwiboon's teeth latch onto her bottom lip. she turns slowly to face jonghyun. 'tell you that i need to think about this, away from you. just for a while.' the words are slow, trembling, afraid. 'tell you i'm not leaving you, i'm just figuring it out. because if this isn't something i can live with, if i do it just because i think you want me to, i'll hate you. i don't want to hate you, jjong.'

****

'i'm sorry,' she says, when the silence stretches too long, when he says nothing at all, just looks at her, like he's trying to trace every feature of her face with his eyes. 

****

'you don't have to say sorry,' jonghyun says finally. but his smile wavers in its place, unconvincing.

****

like in a dream, gwiboon's hand lifts, as if to touch jonghyun's face but she pulls back too quickly. 'i have to go,' she says, and spins around. 

****

'take care of him,' she says to taemin again. 'please.'

****

and then she's gone.

****

~-~

****

'well,' jonghyun says as the front door shuts firmly behind gwiboon. 'well. that was...well.' his smile is still quivering, like static on a broken television set, flickering and unclear, about to fall apart.

****

taemin waits. waits as jonghyun wraps his arms around himself and tries to breathe. waits as he turns away to stare up at the framed photos. waits until his shoulders slump. and then they go up and pull him in and lets him sob, just a little, for something that was once whole and perfect but now cracked at the core. 

****

'come stay with me and jinki for a while,' taemin offers, when jonghyun starts breathing easier. 'i don't like the idea of you here alone.'

****

'will he mind?' jonghyun asks. 

****

'of course not!' taemin bites back a laugh at the idea. _you're too used to a monogamous partner_ he wants to say. 

****

'he thinks you're cute, you know,' taemin remarks casually, and fist pumps in victory in their mind as jonghyun lets out a tiny laugh. 

****

'i'm flattered,' jonghyun says. 'but not interested.'

****

'don't be presumptuous,' taemin scolds jokingly. 'he's more into tall guys anyway.'

****

as jonghyun begins his regular spiel about height being the _worst_ kind of rationale for who to love, taemin grins. at least for a moment, they think. let him forget some pain.

****

~-~

****

'me being here does not mean i agree with this decision,' minho informs gwiboon as she slides into his car. 'in fact, just for the record, i would like to state that i do not agree with it at all.'

****

'i know you don't,' gwiboon says, tugging on the seat belt. 'i appreciate the help though.'

****

for a moment, minho says nothing. just watches as gwiboon settles in, as she lets out a muted sigh, as she looks back towards the block of apartments, longing playing an irregular drumbeat on her ribs. 'you're my best friend, gwi.' is all he says eventually.

****

gwiboon hopes her smile represents the gratitude bubbling in her chest. 'and you're mine,' she says simply.

****

when gwiboon had called him, just a half hour ago, minho had been frustrated with her. _how will this help? you're just running away._

****

and maybe that's how everyone will see it; that she's running away, that she's leaving jonghyun. but she needs to run, needs to get away from the place where they had created their story, built their lives. needs to find a place empty of him to ask herself if love is enough, if it can overcome this increasingly pervasive feeling of helplessness.

****

before she can keep trying, gwiboon needs to know if she wants to at all. 

****

she lets out a breath, and with it all the anxieties and insecurity she's been carrying around too long. she wonders if there's a happy ending to this story.

****

~-~

****

_ticktockticktock_

****

the second hand on the clock in minho's guestroom is too loud. too loud and too obnoxious, like it's counting down the seconds to the end of her life. or at least to the end of her refuge here. she stretches out over the bed, and sighs up at the ceiling. today had been a hectic day at the museum, today she had brought around so many tour groups her throat feels like a desert. today all she wants to do is curl up against jonghyun and breathe him in. but he isn't here, and she isn't there, and it's been one and a half weeks of secluding herself in minho's apartment and she still hasn't made any decisions yet. 

****

the pain of missing jonghyun mutates from a quiet ache throbbing in her chest into a pointed dagger of hurt and her breath leaves her all at once. she wants to cry again but all she's been doing since taemin entered their lives is cry, and she thinks maybe it's time to start doing something more than that.

****

'you silly,' minho says, a little fond, mostly exasperated, when he gets home from work and checks on her. 'all you've been doing is going to work and coming back here to lie on the bed. if this is the thinking you're doing, i haven't seen it achieve anything.'

****

'you're supposed to care about me,' gwiboon says sourly, sitting up and swinging her legs over the side of the bed. 'you're supposed to be sympathetic and concerned and flutter around me with hot tea.'

****

when minho laughs, it is a shout of noise in the room. 'you get that when you aren't being a coward.'

****

gwiboon turns away from minho's big eyes, too wide, too expressive, too damned knowing. 'i'm not being a coward,' she argues weakly. 'i just don't know whether i can do this.'

****

'have you even thought about it at all since you left?' minho sits himself down next to gwiboon. 

****

'when did you become my father?' gwiboon demands, instead of answering. because the answer is no. the answer is she hasn't. the answer is all she's done since she left jonghyun is stare at walls and ceilings and miss him. no, not left, just...took a break from, just stopped seeing for a while. she likes to think they're an incomplete story, not a finished one. not just yet. not ever, hopefully.

****

'when you started needing one again,' minho replies. he slides down into a lying down position and she has no energy to protest to the fact that he hasn't changed after a full day of work. it's his bedsheets anyway, is what he would say. 

****

'i don't need you to father me right now,' she tells him, tiredness dragging her voice. 'i just need a friend.'

there is a beat of silence when her words die away, before minho sits up with a soft sigh, and slings an arm around her shoulders. 'why are you being like this, gwi?' he asks. 'why are you making this so difficult?'

****

'do you think it's easy for _me_?' gwiboon asks, anger blunting the edges of her words. 

****

'gwi,' minho's words are almost a sigh. 'stop thinking about what it means for you, for a second. think about him. think about how all he's doing is trying to love you in the only way he knows how, and how you're basically telling him it isn't good enough.'

****

everything else gwiboon wants to say lodges in her throat, turning into sawdust that coats the back of her mouth. it's true, she realizes. she remembers the way jonghyun had crumbled as she turned away from him, remembers how he reached out only for her to avoid his fingers, remembers how his face collapsed. she remembers how happy they had been, before taemin. and how that had all changed in what had felt like the barest of seconds, because of them, but also because of her. she wonders if maybe jonghyun feels it too, like she is rejecting him each and every day, the way she feels like _he's_ rejecting _her_. she's been trying so hard for him, and he's been trying so hard for her. it seems so ridiculous that they could be destroyed so easily.

****

it isn't something she wants to think about.

****

'what do you know anyway,' she says crabbily, shaking her head to get rid of those tendrils of guilt that had grown out of the doubt that minho had planted. ' _you're_ not in love with a polyamorous guy.'

****

there is something like discomfort and guilt that breezes past minho's face and gwiboon only just catches it. 

****

'what was that?' she demands.

****

'what was what?' minho asks back, averting his gaze.

****

'that expression on your face just now,' gwiboon accuses. 'when i said that you're not in love with a-' she stops, a certain horror descending. 'choi minho, what are you not telling me.'

****

minho's lips pull upwards slowly, like they're working very hard against gravity, and there is too much trepidation in his eyes when they travel back to look into hers. 'i met someone,' he says quietly. 'he's the owner of this cafe i go to quite often. we started talking one day, and things...kind of happened.'

****

'and he's polyamorous,' gwiboon states. she slants an incredulous stare in his direction. 'i can't believe this. of all the kinds of guys you could have gotten involved with-'

****

tilting her head, she scrutinizes him carefully. 'you aren't too deep in yet, you can still get away. it's more trouble than it's worth. trust me.'

****

'do you really believe that?' minho asks. 'so everything you have with jonghyun wasn't worth it then?'

****

'we're not talking about me,' gwiboon replies, ignoring the heat behind her eyes that means tears; tears she cannot afford anymore.

****

'we are though,' minho says calmly. 'isn't what you're telling me to do, something you want to do yourself?'

****

her heart is beating too quick in her chest, like it's trying to crack her ribcage, fall to the floor and shatter. she shakes her head rapidly. 'i want you to be happy, i want you to find someone who'll love you, who'll make you feel special, who won't accidentally make you feel small and worthless, and _not enough_ .' she sucks in a harsh breath as the last words leave her throat, and she thinks maybe it _is_ more about her than she's pretending.

****

minho chuckles lightly. 'i don't love him yet, and i don't think he loves me. but i like him, i like spending time with him. and his smile is like every bit of sunlight got caught between his lips. i think i could love him, and i want to see where this goes.'

****

'but,' gwiboon starts. 'but he might have someone else, and how will that make you feel?'

****

'he does,' minho says, one shoulder rising in a half shrug. 'he has a long term partner, they've been together for eons.'

****

as gwiboon's mouth opens again to object, to argue, to list the reasons he should untangle himself before it's too late, minho clamps a hand over it. 'love is infinite, gwi,' he says quietly. 'what isn't is time, and this takes work, but it's work i'm willing to try. yes, he has someone else, but so do i. my someone elses aren't romantic, but they take up time just as much as his someone else. i like him, and i know he likes me. why can't that be enough?'

****

gwiboon looks up at minho's soft, soft, sympathetic eyes and everything she thinks she could say collects into a lump in her throat. as minho's hand falls away, she lets out a sob. 'why are you taking this so well,' she hiccups. 'why can't _i_?' 

****

'because you had just him for years,' minho replies, pulling her in so her head rests against his shoulder. 

****

'i miss him,' gwiboon says. 'so much.'

****

'i know,' minho says soothingly, his hands a comforting rhythm against her back, and gwiboon starts thinking that maybe, maybe that emotion, that love, and yearning, maybe it was enough to work with. maybe it always had been, just she never wanted to notice.

****

'what's his name?' she says, into the ensuing silence. 'this cafe man.'

****

'jinki,' minho says. 'his name is jinki.'


	2. part 2

_can we meet?_ says the message blinking on taemin's phone screen. 

****

the incredulity of taemin's bark of laughter makes jinki look up from where he's doing accounts on the dining table. taemin doesn't reply his hum of curiosity, merely looks back down when their phone buzzes again.

****

_this is gwiboon by the way. in case you lost my number._

****

and before they can press the reply button,

****

_don't tell jjong._

****

'what a _fool_ ,' taemin mutters through their teeth.

****

'who's a fool?' jinki queries, walking around the table to stand in front of taemin's chair. 

****

'where's jonghyun?' taemin asks back, instead of answering. 

****

puzzlement creases between jinki's eyebrows. 'in the shower,' he says. 'why?'

****

'his drama queen girlfriend messaged me,' taemin explains. 'wants to meet me, doesn't want me to tell him. i can't believe she actually kept my number.'

****

'you're being cruel again,' jinki chides, but there is amusement in his tone. 

****

'you would be too,' taemin says shortly. 'if you saw the way he sobbed after she left. if you hear the way he still cries now, sometimes. when you walk past the guestroom at night.'

****

'polyamorous people just really shouldn't get involved with monogamous ones,' they conclude, sighing, then turns to jinki with a glint in their eyes. 'watch out that your new guy doesn't turn out like that.' 

****

'so far so good,' jinki says, smile still steadily in place. 'you'll meet him soon. he's really intrigued by you.'

****

the sound that comes out of taemin's mouth is as far from enthusiastic as it can get, but jinki's smile doesn't dim. 'stop being an asshole, tae,' he says. 'no one likes assholes.'

****

'apparently both you and jonghyun do,' they retort, and jinki lets out a loud laugh, reaching over to ruffle taemin's hair, but he doesn't argue. 

****

'answer the text,' he says, and goes back to his work.

****

taemin fiddles with the phone for a few minutes, reading and rereading the messages. 'what should i say?' they finally ask. 

****

'whatever you think is right,' jinki replies, still staring at his work.

****

'that she's dumb and she should stop overreacting and just reconcile with him because obviously she still loves him?' 

****

'you can do better than that, tae.' jinki is unperturbed.

****

'she wants me gone, you know,' taemin says quietly. 'she wants me gone, and i don't want to go, but i don't want _her_ to go either. because it will break him. deep down, i think she wants to stay too, but she doesn't understand _this_ , and i don't know how to make her understand.'

****

jinki lets out a long breath. 'just tell her you'll meet her, and see what she has to say.'

****

by the time jonghyun comes out of the shower and joins them, taemin is hanging off jinki's arm and disrupting his work, and the message has been sent.

****

_is next tuesday okay?_

****

⁂

****

when gwiboon edges through the door of the little restaurant that taemin has chosen for their meeting place, she looks petrified. 

****

'i won't eat you up, you know,' taemin tells her, when she slides into the chair in front of them. 

****

'i wouldn't really know that, would i?' gwiboon replies, but her voice is muted.

****

taemin really looks at her then, at her elegant fingers tightly clenched together, at the shadows under her eyes, and they relax their guard, pitying smile curving over their lips. 

****

'what did you want to meet me for?' they ask, tone gentler, after the food is ordered and served.

****

'how is he?' gwiboon asks, the words tumbling over each other, like it's the only thing in the world she wants to know.

****

'how do you think?' taemin challenges, then presses fingertips to the side of their head. 'no, i promised i wouldn't be an asshole. he's not great. he misses you. and you would know this if you _just_ called him.'

****

'i needed to think,' gwiboon says. 'and i thought- well, he had you. i thought he'd be okay. i thought he wouldn't-'

****

before gwiboon can finish talking, taemin rolls their eyes and snorts. 'okay you really _are_ a fool and i'm not being nice anymore. he _loves_ you, don't you understand that? even if he had three more partners, it wouldn't matter, because he _loves_ _you_. just because we love more than one person doesn't mean they're all interchangeable.'

****

the gwiboon in front of them is not the gwiboon they had first met. that gwiboon had been haughty and sure, had embarrassed them with her wit, and laughed in a way that left no space for insecurity. that gwiboon had been whittled away slowly by her own thoughts and fears, which left her aching and almost empty, and under the irritation, taemin feels a sense of sympathy so strong it alarms them.

****

'he loves you, gwiboon,' they repeat. 'i know i told you that you needed to think, to decide. but i didn't think you'd leave him without contact for weeks.'

****

gwiboon is quiet, too quiet, staring down at her stew like it holds the answers in its watery depths. taemin can see tears collecting under her eyelashes. they reach over and catch the droplets with their thumb. 'why do you insist on making this so difficult?' they ask softly.

****

'i'm not used to sharing,' gwiboon says finally, voice broken in half. she looks up and meets taemin's eyes. 'it's a place that everything in me is screaming should be occupied by just one, by just me. but in your world, and his, it doesn't work like that.'

****

'i knew it _here,_ ' she says, pointing to her head. 'but not _here._ ' her hand drifts to cover her chest where her heart beats. 'and that's the part that hurts.'

****

'if you're going to leave him, do it quick,' taemin says bluntly. 'don't extend the pain. for both of you.'

****

'but i _don't want to,_ ' gwiboon snaps quickly, as if on instinct, words coming out with a surety that had been absent in everything else she had said. 

****

taemin smile is slow. 'and there's your answer,' they tell her. 'we can work with that.' 

****

and gwiboon looks up with alarm that slowly mutates into a form of realization.

****

⁂

****

'i met gwiboon today,' taemin says to jonghyun abruptly, pushing open the door to the guestroom when they get back. 

****

'how is she?' jonghyun says quickly, sitting up and pulling his earbud from his ear. 

****

'still a fool,' taemin declares. they settle down next to jonghyun on the bed, usurping his pillow, dodging as jonghyun half-heartedly tries to get it back.

****

'she's not,' jonghyun says quietly. 'she's just conflicted.' he turns away, and taemin feels a slight stir of guilt in their heart. 'i can't deny what i am, and she doesn't really know how to live with it. i don't blame her.'

****

'why did you meet her?' he turns back to look at taemin, and taemin tries to ignore the slight wetness of his eyes. _these two cry way too much,_ they think.

****

'i think she just wanted to find out how you were,' they say. 'without actually seeing you.'

****

the sigh that drops out of jonghyun's mouth is accompanied by the sag of his shoulders. 'i miss her,' he says simply. 'i wish this was easier for her.' taemin reaches over and tugs jonghyun in.

****

'she misses you too,' taemin says softly. 'i wish it was easier for both of you.' jonghyun hums in agreement, and repositions himself so his head is nestled in the crook between taemin's neck and shoulder. his arm settles around taemin's waist.

****

'stay with me tonight?' he asks. taemin nods, and clutches him closer. 

****

⁂

****

apparently taemin's method of 'working on it' involves meeting gwiboon regularly; to get them to become friends. or something like that.. taemin is gentle sometimes, angry other times, like they can't quite decide how to treat her. and most times gwiboon is sure taemin is expecting her to admit to just wanting to be out of jonghyun's life. but when she asks, at lunch, the fourth time in two weeks, taemin fixes her with a glare that is strangely lined with amusement.

****

'you make him happy,' they say bluntly. 'i like him being happy. don't you?' gwiboon doesn't answer. guilt has clogged up her throat, turned flesh into gravel. 

****

_selfish_ whispers a voice in her head, making the world spin. _selfish._ tears prick at the edge of her eyes. again. again. she wonders when her tear ducts will dry up.

****

'you both cry so much,' taemin remarks softly, almost tender, the kind of tenderness that makes gwiboon think the harshness that surfaces is only a mask. 'i can't imagine what it's like when you're watching a sad movie.'

****

it feels awkward on her tongue but she starts giggling, tears turning the sound murky. because the memory of jonghyun sobbing into her shoulder the last time they had watched a tragic movie circles in front of her vision. she can't even remember which movie it had been, just the cold wetness of jonghyun's tears seeping through her shirt, the way he pouted when she teased and the bubbling joy so warm under her skin.

****

'he's worse than me,' she says. 'you'll see.'

****

when she looks back at them, taemin's eyes are gleaming. 'this is the first time i've seen you laugh since you walked away from him,' he says. 

****

the observation feels like a blade sunk through gwiboon's ribs.

****

'how is he?' she asks again. the only question that is always constant between them. 

****

'happy you're meeting me,' taemin says simply. 'sad you won't see him yet.'

****

_yet_. it sounds hopeful. gwiboon wonders if there is anything left to be hopeful about. 

****

'am i just extending this for nothing?' she muses, half to taemin, half to whatever deity might be listening in. 'should i just cut the ties and make it quick? what's the right thing to do?'

****

her gaze sweeps through the restaurant, takes note of the young couples with shoulders touching, the little families sitting cosily together, the solo diners; some obviously uncomfortable, some with a quiet, centered sureness she envies. what are their stories? she thinks. what secrets do they carry? how much would they compromise and sacrifice for love?

****

'i can't tell you that,' taemin answers, after a beat of silence. 'you'll need to find your own way.'

****

the smile that lingers on gwiboon's mouth is crooked and bitter. 'i wish someone would just tell me what to do.'

****

'that wouldn't be a fun life, though, would it?' taemin's eyes are like flashing danger signs.

****

'you're not a very nice person, are you?' gwiboon says pointedly. 'so different from the person who called me gorgeous at first sight.' 

****

'i only tell the truth,' taemin returns, but there's a smile hiding in the edges of his mouth, perhaps because this is the first time gwiboon has snapped back with something resembling her previous energy. and gwiboon realizes, with a horrid sinking feeling, that if _she_ had told jonghyun the truth of the angry churning turmoil in her stomach as his relationship with taemin had deepened, that if she hadn't told him she was alright when she wasn't, that if she hadn't let everything inside her turn into a cyclone she needed to run from, maybe she would have been able to build the bridges taemin is trying to form from the rubble now. the realization is like icicles stabbing up into her lungs.

****

'i should have just told him, shouldn't i?' her question is a breath above a whisper, a drop in the ocean of regret rising up around her.

****

taemin doesn't answer. 

****

'how did you meet him?' they ask instead, and gwiboon almost snorts at this obvious change of subject.

****

'did he not tell you already?' she asks, miming shock, deciding to play along. 'i'm surprised.'

****

taemin's grin is a slow blooming one. 'we have better things to talk about,' they tell her. 'even if that surprises you.'

****

'i'm insulted,' gwiboon retorts swiftly, forgetting, just for a moment, who she is with. 'i should take that up with jjong.' she did that often, with other people, act like she's the only thing jonghyun knows how to talk about. it's a running joke between them, and something that, she acknowledges, probably has to change now.

****

smile turning crafty, taemin tilts their head at her. 'yes, you should,' is all they say.

****

gwiboon studiously avoids the knowing look in taemin's eyes, embarrassment a neon yellow in her head. she still doesn't know when she can face jonghyun. 'i met him through his sister,' she says. 

****

_sodam's wedding had been beautiful, sodam had looked beautiful, everything had been absolutely beautiful. and gwiboon would rather hang herself than stay any longer. damn soyou for not appearing, she had been the only single person at the table with four other couples, it was like the universe was mocking her. not that she particularly wanted anything like that; 22 year old art history graduate kim gwiboon had a lot to do in life, a lot to accomplish. but it would be kind of sweet, she admitted to herself, for her to have someone with her while attending this celebration of love._

****

_'hello,' a voice said in her ear, and when she turned around she wondered if maybe a capricious god had decided to casually grant her wayward wish. 'i'm jonghyun,' said the guy standing behind her chair. 'sodam's brother.' he grinned, and she decided she liked his smile._

****

'sodam freaked out,' gwiboon tells taemin, laughing fondly at the memory. 

****

_'i said go accompany her,' sodam shrieked at jonghyun when she found them later kissing in a corner. 'not attempt to eat her!'_

****

_jonghyun tried to look abashed, but only succeeded in grinning wider. 'she's cute,' he informed sodam._

****

_'i_ know _she's cute,' sodam snapped. 'she's my cute little junior. and_ you _are my terror of a younger brother.'_

****

_'_ i _think he's cute,' gwiboon interjected._

****

_sodam flipping out was actually really entertaining to watch._

****

'does she know?' taemin asks, as gwiboon's voice trails off and she drifts into remembering.

****

'know what?' 

****

'that jonghyun is…' taemin averts their eyes, as if a little afraid.

****

gwiboon laughs softly. perhaps taemin, too, has moments they cannot be entirely blunt. 'yes,' she responds, shrugging. 'it doesn't bother her. she was worried for me though. turns out she was right.' she looks away, remembering the furrow between sodam's eyebrows, and the concern caught between the syllables of her words, and wonders if jonghyun has told her about the estrangement yet.

****

'she doesn't have to stay right,' taemin states. 

****

'maybe,' gwiboon says, smiling slightly. 'maybe not.' but she thinks she hears hope beckoning in the distance.

****

⁂

****

_is jinki still there?_

****

minho can imagine the anxiety and insecurity behind gwiboon's words. he sighs, fiddling with his phone, and jinki looks over. 

****

'it's my friend who's staying over,' minho explains, to the curious glance jinki throws his way. 'she's on the way back i think.'

****

'do you need me to leave?' jinki asks, moving to cautiously slide his hand over minho's. minho had invited him over for one of those cliched movie dates; takeout and fizzy drinks and microwaveable popcorn. 

****

'i don't want you to,' minho says, turning his hand so their fingers interlock. he doesn't miss the surprised smile that lights on jinki's mouth. 'but gwiboon might be hard to deal with at the moment. she went to meet taemin at lunch today, and then had to work overtime and she's probably going to be a little bit high strung. she probably won't want to see you and me together at the moment.'

****

'taemin..,' jinki repeats haltingly.

****

'yeah,' minho says. 'that's the name of her boyfriend's new partner. hey, same name as _your_ partner. weird huh?'

****

'you never told me your friend's name is gwiboon,' jinki remarks. his expression looks almost like he's unlocked a puzzle. 

****

minho tilts his head, watching as jinki's eyes narrow, as if he's seeing a solution to a problem minho doesn't know. 

****

'is her boyfriend's name jonghyun?' jinki asks a while later, and his sunshine smile turns triumphant when minho nods.

****

'your friend's boyfriend is my partner's other boyfriend,' he announces. minho blinks; the combination of words sound almost foreign in his head.

****

'wait are you saying i'm in some sort of three times removed relationship with gwiboon because that's gross.' when minho cringes, jinki laughs loudly. 

****

' _that's_ what you're focusing on?' 

****

'but,' minho whines. 'it _is_ gross.'

****

'do you know what we can do with this information?' jinki says, grinning widely. 

****

'what are you planning?' minho asks, mirroring grin spreading on his face. he likes this part of jinki, the part that drops the cafe owner responsibility and turns into a little bit of a prankster.

****

'you know how you wanted to meet taemin?' jinki starts. 'i think i know a way we can kill two birds with one stone.'

****

⁂

****

by the time gwiboon comes back, jinki has left for home, pressing a chaste kiss to minho's cheek that had made him a little queasy. but he lets him do that, it's a compromise. minho understands compromise.

****

he wishes gwiboon did.

****

but there always are those things you cannot compromise on. he wonders if sharing a lover really is one of them for her.

****

'where did jinki go?' gwiboon asks as she locks the door behind her. 

****

'he left already,' minho tells her, reaching out to grab her bag from her.

****

'oh,' she sweeps her fringe out of her eyes and looks up at him, guilt shimmering on the edges of them. 'did he get bored of you that quickly?' her attempts at a quip is lost in the tremor of her voice. 

****

'no,' minho says. 'i didn't want him here in case...you needed to cry.'

****

to his surprise, instead of crying, gwiboon's eyes widen and then she throws back her head and laughs. 'i cry too much, don't i? i cry and i cry and i've been doing nothing about anything. i wanted to cry today too, but it's stupid, isn't it? so stupid. what do these drops of saltwater even achieve?'

****

when her laughter peters out she curls up in a chair with her knees pulled to her chin. 'do you think he cries too?'

****

'do you want him to?' minho asks, settling on the floor next to her chair. 

****

'no,' gwiboon says. 'i want him to be happy. i want him to laugh. his eyes get all crinkly when he laughs, you know? and his nose scrunches up. it's adorable. i've always loved that.'

****

minho doesn't say anything, watching as she unscrambles her thoughts out loud. the first time in a while she's done that with him. 

****

'do you think i can do it?' she asks him. 'do you think i can still love him, if i _know_ that he's out with another person, loving them, kissing them, having sex with them, hands on their skin, mouth on-' her words trail off as minho flinches. 

****

'sorry ming,' she says touching her fingers gently to his hair. 'i know you don't like talking about this sort of stuff.'

****

minho sighs. 'compromise,' he tells her, mind winding back to his thoughts of earlier. 'i'm your friend and i love you. so i compromise. i'll listen but if it gets too overwhelming i'll let you know.'

****

'compromise,' gwiboon repeats. she looks at him. 'do you think i can compromise on this?' 

****

there's something a lot more certain in the way she questions him now than before. 'i don't know, gwi,' he says. 'you need to decide that on your own.'

****

she slants her sharp eyes towards him, and her smile turns somber. 'i think i know an answer,' she tells him. 'but i'm not sure it's the right one.'

****

'you know,' she says casually, before he can reply. 'after all this deliberation, it would be ironic if i went back to him and he tells me he doesn't want me anymore.'

****

minho thinks he shouldn't be blamed, or hit, when he laughs so hard his sides hurt.

****

⁂

****

'a party?' taemin asks. 'you want a party just for us to meet your new squeeze? why do we need a party?'

****

'you do realize you said party three times right?' jinki points out. he sees taemin's lips start curving into a pout, and he reaches over to ruffle their hair. 'and it's not a party, just a dinner thing, with you, me, and him. and jonghyun, if he wants.'

****

taemin raises an eyebrow. 'if he wants? jonghyun wants to sit in his room and write emotional poetry and listen to sad love songs, that's what jonghyun wants. so yes, he'll be there. taemin's orders.'

****

'are you jealous?' jinki asks quietly. there had been a bit too much temper in taemin's voice. the abruptness of the topic change leaves taemin mute for a moment. 

****

'no, i'm not,' taemin says eventually, sighing. 'they've been together so long, it's normal that he's all broken up about it. i just, i wish she'd be clear and i wish _he_ would demand clarity. i don't understand why they're both so willing to stand there in indecision.'

****

'did you tell him that?' jinki asks, reaching forward to gather taemin into his arms. he feels weary all of a sudden, and he thinks it must be so much more tiring for taemin.

****

'yeah,' they reply. 'he said she needs to come to a decision on her own, and he'll respect it. whatever it is. so the ball's in little miss drama queen's court and lord knows what _she's_ thinking.'

****

'don't _you_?' jinki says, biting back a grin.

****

'no, i don't.' taemin leans their forehead into jinki's. 'she's always talking about not wanting to break up with him, but at the same time i'm not sure she's able to be with him if i'm still with him. and i _really like him._ it _sucks_ to be looked at like an intruder.'

****

'jonghyun doesn't think you are,' jinki soothes, and he crosses his arms around taemin's back and pulls them closer so their bodies are flush. 

****

'he's the only reason i'm trying to figure her out,' taemin says, breath gusting out of their mouth.

****

'i know,' jinki coos. 'i know.'

****

he wonders if the plan is going to explode in his face.

****

⁂

****

_'someone...no, all of them are going to kill us,' minho said._

****

_'no, they're not,' jinki objected. 'why_ wouldn't _you decide to bring someone for moral support?'_

****

_'because she's just a random person and isn't involved in this relationship, as far as anyone knows?'_

****

_'so you're a pathetic human being who needs to bring backup for every new experience. that's perfectly rational.'_

****

_minho glared at jinki. jinki stared back with a half smile stretched across his mouth, until minho's lips trembled and he smiled too. 'i hope this works. i'm tired of dealing with it. i bet you're tired of dealing with it too.'_

****

_jinki slung a careful arm around minho's shoulder, heart leaping when minho leaned into his side. 'i just want things to get easier,' jinki said._

****

⁂

****

'oh by the way,' jinki mentions to taemin, a day before the dinner. 'he's bringing a friend. i hope that's okay.'

****

'his secret other lover?' taemin asks, barely glancing up from their phone. 'oh wait, no. he's _monogamous_ . i forgot both my boyfriends are _stupid_.' the insult is biting, but jinki just waits.

****

'it doesn't matter as long as we have enough food, i suppose,' taemin says, when jinki refuses to take the bait. 'why does he need to bring someone? am i that scary?' they look up to peer at jinki.

****

'i ordered enough,' jinki says casually. 'and no, you're not. you just have spikes when you're protecting someone you love.'

****

'let's hope your new guy isn't anything like the drama queen,' taemin says wearily. 'we don't need another one of _those_.' 

****

jinki lets taemin hide their face in his chest and wonders exactly how much yelling he'll end up hearing if this ends with gwiboon running away from everything again and jonghyun breaking into more tears.

****

⁂

****

when the doorbell rings, jinki looks over to taemin lounging in front of the television. 'can you get that, tae?'

****

taemin glances over at jinki. 'why?' they drawl. 'isn't it your new guy? shouldn't you get it and then shyly introduce him to me?'

****

'i'm busy,' jinki says, indicating the drinks laid out on the table in front of him. 'and i would never do that.'

****

'jonghyun did though,' taemin grumbles. 'when he introduced me to gwiboon.'

****

'are you _comparing_ now, lee taemin?' jinki teases. 'want to chuck me and become monogamous?'

****

taemin lets out a shaky laugh. 'what if he ends up hating me like she does?'

****

'he won't, and she doesn't.' jinki crosses over to press his mouth into taemin's hair. 'and _i_ love you.'

****

'i love you, too,' taemin replies, soft.

****

the moment is broken when the doorbell rings again. jinki can imagine the worry making its way across minho's face and chuckles. 'please get that, tae,' he says. 'i promise he won't bite.'

****

muttering quiet, unsavory things under their breath, taemin strides to the door.

****

'hi,' they chirp, talking before the door fully opens. 'you must be minho. i'm…' when his voice trails off, jinki figures they've seen who exactly is on the doorstep. _well_ , he ponders, as the silence slowly eats away at every small noise, almost sinister. _this_ could _end in a bloodbath, didn't consider that._

****

'taemin,' says an unfamiliar voice. jinki guesses it must be gwiboon.

****

'hello drama qu- i mean, gwiboon. what the hell are you doing here?' 

****

_good job on your mouth, tae,_ jinki thinks, raising his eyes to the ceiling.

****

'did you just almost call her drama queen?' minho's voice cuts in, amusement in every word.

****

'i-'

****

'oh don't worry, i refer to her as that all the time.'

****

there's a beat before taemin snorts out a laugh.

****

'jinki,' they yell. 'i like your boy.'

****

'is jjong here?' gwiboon's voice is quiet but it's enough to stop the chaos of minho and taemin getting to know each other.

****

jinki decides it's time to walk to the door.

****

'hey,' minho says gently, waving at him over the heads of taemin and gwiboon.

****

'hey you,' jinki says back, smiling at the way minho's hand is on gwiboon's elbow, like he's holding her in place. jinki slides his hand into taemin's, squeezing to remind them to be nice.

****

taemin's glare at gwiboon is littered with warning signs, but their voice is cordial. 'if you're going to run away from him, again. i rather you just leave now.'

****

'i won't,' gwiboon says simply. her stare right back at taemin is almost as fiery.

****

'what's with all the noise?' jonghyun's voice makes them all freeze.

****

gwiboon is the first to become unstuck, shaking off minho's hand, pushing her way past taemin and jinki, into the house, stopping directly in front of jonghyun. 

****

'hi,' she says, her voice penitent, almost sorrowful.

****

jonghyun stares at her like maybe he's seeing a ghost.

****

⁂

****

'are you real?'

****

when he hears the words coming out of his mouth, jonghyun flinches. gwiboon lets out a choked laugh, and rolls her eyes and he thinks he's never quite likes seeing her do that as when she's right in front of him. 

****

'yes,' she says, almost teasing. 'did you think i died?'

****

'well,' he says, seriously, meaning his words to hurt. 'you did disappear from my life abruptly, so it's as if you did.'

****

the flicker of guilt and helplessness that goes past her face hurts him too. but before he can apologize, she hurtles forward, and flings arms around his neck. he can't quite make out what she's saying; a flow of words tripping and tumbling over each other; what he does hear is _i'm sorry i'm so sorry_ whispered over and over like a song, like a chant, like a magic spell to bind them back together. 

****

but they aren't a fairy tale, and there is no magic book. they are just humans who've screwed up a little, a lot. and it might be foolish, but he wants to forgive her, let the past be the past, hold her close and pretend everything had never happened.

****

'it's okay,' he finds himself whispering back, pressing his mouth to her ear. 'it's okay, it's okay.' even if it isn't, even if there's too much to be said that he still hasn't said, even if he hates her a little bit, for abandoning him, for leaving him, for throwing his life out of balance. 

****

for doing to him, he realizes. what she felt he did to her. 

****

maybe this separation hadn't been entirely unhelpful.

****

'it's not,' she tells him quietly. 'and i know it's not.' because there really is no magic spell, and the blood thrumming in his head sounds like fear. she unclasps her arms from around his neck and steps back, tracing his face with her eyes. 'so what do we do now?'

****

jonghyun crosses his arms, and scrutinizes her. 'i've always known what i wanted to do, that hasn't changed. it's always been you who hasn't been sure.' 

****

gwiboon looks up, and her eyes are strangely bright. 'don't have sex with me immediately after having sex with taemin.' 

****

'what?' jonghyun sputters, confused by the strange detour in conversation. he can hear taemin's sharp laughter, and minho's low voice shushing them.

****

'i forgot to add that to the list,' she explains. there's an almost impish grin stretched on her mouth, but her eyes are pleading. 

****

'i'm sorry,' she whispers again, when he doesn't answer, skating skittish fingertips along the side of his face. 'can we start over?'

****

'will you stop running away?' jonghyun murmurs. he catches her hand in his. 

****

gwiboon doesn't answer immediately, just closes her eyes. 'if i ever need to run,' she says, after a breath, opening her eyes to stare directly at him. 'i promise to always come back and i promise to always tell you why.'

****

it isn't the promise that jonghyun had been looking for, but it's a promise that he knows she'll be able to live up to, and somehow that's enough. 'okay,' he says slowly. 'okay.'

****

'i love you,' gwiboon says. 'i love you so much.'

****

'i know,' jonghyun says, finally letting himself grin. ' _that's_ never been something i was unsure about.' 

****

when gwiboon laughs, it's that loud, raucous, distinctive laugh he hasn't heard in a long time. 'stupid,' she says, but her eyes are shining.

****

'i love you too,' jonghyun says.

****

'i know,' gwiboon whispers. 'and i'm not trying to convince myself this time.'

****

⁂

****

'i told you this would work,' jinki hisses to minho in a stage whisper. 

****

'you _knew?'_ comes taemin's accusing voice. 'are you saying you _planned this?'_

****

'it was shockingly simple actually,' jinki says. 'i've no idea why the rest of you never figured it out.'

****

'i'm trying to decide if i should be unhappy that you never thought to tell me,' taemin grouses at jinki.

****

'i guess _i_ should be honoured minho actually decided to tell _me,'_ gwiboon interjects, untangling herself from jonghyun and walking over. jinki's eyebrows raise.

****

'you told her? i thought we weren't gonna tell anyone anything.'

****

minho shrugs. 'i decided it was fairer to both of them if gwi came here on her own volition," his eyes flicker to gwiboon and the smile on her lips is answer enough.

****

'thank you,' jonghyun's voice is quietly grateful, and minho tilts his head in acknowledgment.

****

'what happened that led to this?' taemin asks gwiboon, breaking the calm. 'the last time i talked to you, you still weren't sure.'

****

'you mostly,' gwiboon tells them. 'and minho. but yeah, mostly you.' 

****

'should i be honoured?' taemin asks, raising an eyebrow, skeptical smile on their lips. 

****

'you're kind of a bitch, you know,' gwiboon remarks. 

****

taemin lets out an incredulous laugh. 'you're one to talk.'

****

gwiboon draws closer to taemin, furrows between her eyebrows. 'do you hate me? you can't hate me if this is going to work.' 

****

' _now_ you get it,' taemin says, tone exasperated. 'why couldn't you have realised this months ago?'

****

gwiboon backs away, shame burning a hole in her chest. 

****

'enough, tae,' jinki warns. 'i think gwiboon understands now. you don't need to dig it in.' taemin glances his way and sighs.

****

'i don't hate you,' they say, finally. 'i just don't want you to regret this again six months down the road and leave him for good. it's not fair to him, and to me. jonghyun might have easily forgiven but he's in love with you and can't think straight sometimes.'

****

'i'm sure,' gwiboon says. 'i _am_ sure.' her gaze falls on jonghyun at the side quietly watching everything unfold. 'i thought having taemin meant you loved me less, that there was something wrong with me. but i realized, you never acted like that, you never changed how you treated me. and at the end of the day the only one hurting me...was me. i know you love me, and that's enough.'

****

'i'm sorry,' she says, turning back to look at taemin. 'i've made you feel unwelcome and like you weren't allowed to love him.' taemin stares at her, silent, arms crossed until jinki nudges them in the back. 

****

'oh you mono people,' taemin says finally, shaking their head, half smile on their lips. 'you're always so silly, aren't you.' they meet her eyes and their eyes are gentle, and gwiboon feels panic leave her chest in woosh.

****

'hey, i take offense to that statement!' minho objects, breaking the peace, sounding insulted.

****

'and i don't really care,' taemin responds, sticking out their tongue at minho.

****

'jinki!'

****

'why am i _dating_ with these two _?'_ jinki asks the ceiling.

****

gwiboon observes the chaos descending with a kind of incredulity. 'your best friend has taken to this like a fish to water, huh?' jonghyun says, coming up to sling an arm around her waist. she leans into him and sighs. 

****

'are we okay?' he asks. 

****

'what if,' she starts, instead of answering. 'what if i need you one day, and taemin does too? what if it's a day that minho needs jinki and taemin needs someone and i need you too? what if? what happens if you have to choose?'

****

jonghyun doesn't get a chance to answer before minho laughs from behind them. 'then we do this,' he says, and pulls them all into a group hug.

****

'it's never been about choosing one over the other, gwi,' jonghyun tells her softly. 

****

gwiboon smiles. maybe there's something safe here, she thinks. something i can work with, something to hold onto.

****

'you know,' jinki remarks musingly. 'if gwiboon and minho get together, we'll have a perfect circle.'

****

'ew,' gwiboon says, cringing.

****

'that's _gross,'_ minho exclaims at the exact same time.

****

there's laughter around them, warm like a quilt.

****

jonghyun turns questioning eyes to gwiboon, and she smiles, tentative, careful. 'can we take this slow?' she asks. 'can you slow down with taemin? just take it step by step. so i can get used to it. i want this, but if it goes to fast, i won't be able to.'

****

'that's easy,' jonghyun says, beaming. hardly a compromise, he thinks. not as much as he's asking from her.

****

'i think i should be insulted,' taemin remarks to the air, but they don't object when jonghyun starts talking seriously about the amount of time spent, and gwiboon asks if once every two weeks is okay at the start.

****

they lean closer and bumps shoulders with gwiboon and when she smiles their way, tentative and shy, they think, again, about how incredibly beautiful she is. they smile back.


	3. part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this one shifts tone a little, widens the scope a little and looks more at what happens after taemin meets minho

'compromise is a two way street,' minho announces abruptly from where he's lounging in an armchair near the television. 'or in your case, three.' he turns to look at the trio of jonghyun, gwiboon and taemin, cloistered together at the dining table figuring out how to work at their situation. 

****

taemin raises a single eyebrow, and opens their mouth. but jonghyun talks before they can. 'why suddenly mention that?' he asks minho.

****

'just a reminder,' minho says calmly. 'in case you forgot.' he looks meaningfully at gwiboon in particular.

****

'are you trying to be my father again, ming?' gwiboon drawls. 

****

'you know i only am when you need one,' minho responds, sending her a cheeky smile. 

****

'oh go talk to jinki and leave us alone,' she says, rolling her eyes. but her tone is gentle. 

****

minho lets out a laugh, stands up and stretches and wanders over to look jonghyun in the eye. 'i helped bring you back together, but this still stands,' he says pleasantly. 'if you deliberately hurt her, i'll kill you.' then he grins wider, reaches over to ruffle taemin's hair and ambles to jinki's room.

****

'well,' jonghyun says. 'i don't know what everyone else thought, but _i_ just got a horrid _deja vu_ moment to the first time i ever met minho. that was not fun.' 

****

unfortunately, no one is listening to him. taemin is staring in the direction minho had walked to, conflicted expression on their face. and gwiboon is squinting at taemin's unguarded expression and the pink flush streaking across their cheeks.

****

'are you _actually blushing?'_ gwiboon questions, amusement flooding her words.

****

'no,' taemin squeaks. they hide their face in their arms. 'go back to deciding how to divide up the time.'

****

'do you have a _crush_ on my best friend?' gwiboon asks, ignoring taemin's attempts at redirecting the conversation. a smug smile spreads slowly across her face.

****

' _no,'_ taemin says, too loud. 'i've only known him for like a day. shut. up.'

****

'oh my god, you _do.'_

****

'shut _up_ gwiboon.'

****

jonghyun clears his throat loudly. and in the silence that descends they can hear him grumble. 'well, figures the tall people get all the attention.' 

****

'are you jealous, tiny?' gwiboon says teasingly, leaning over to press lips to jonghyun's cheek.

****

'yes,' jonghyun says, letting a pout form on his mouth. 'tall people get all the pretty ones.'

****

'you have two,' taemin reminds him.

****

'one probably has a crush on that very tall man,' jonghyun points out. 'the other is literally his best friend on the face of this earth. my two people are also his.' his pout deepens comically. 

****

'you're ridiculous,' gwiboon says, laughing. she pokes him in the side just as taemin does too and as jonghyun shrieks and squirms between them, somehow it devolves into a tickle fight. 

****

⁂

****

'any chance,' taemin starts tentatively, when they all get their breath back. 'minho could consider a poly relationship? as in actually being with two people. at once.'

****

there's something like sadness in taemin's eyes, and for a moment gwiboon's heart aches for them. 'i asked him about that before, being polyamorous. he said he's not.' taemin lets out a sigh and shrugs. 

****

'that's that then,' they say airily. 'it's just a little bit of attraction anyway. no big deal. just a silly dumb crush. on my boyfriend's boyfriend. i am a train wreck.'

****

gwiboon reaches out on instinct, cradling taemin to herself and she thinks how strange it is, that minho was the reason for their bonding. her best friend is possibly magic.

****

'minho is something magical, isn't he?' jonghyun says quietly, voicing gwiboon's thoughts. his eyes are gazing at them tenderly. 'he somehow made you guys friends, without even really trying.'

****

gwiboon smiles at him over taemin's shoulder and when he leans over to hug taemin too, she pulls him closer to them both.

****

⁂

****

'you okay with taemin's little crush on ming?' gwiboon asks jonghyun later that night, when they're changing the sheets of their own bed, the first time in weeks they've been back to their house together. gwiboon silently thanks the strange compulsion that made her go back and clean everything the week before, even if it had been done on the edge of tears.

****

jonghyun doesn't answer immediately. he's too busy grinning happily around the room, as though it's the very first time he's seeing everything. gwiboon watches him with a fond light in her eyes, there's a luminous kind of joy in her chest at the thought that somehow they had figured out a way to keep walking the same path. 

****

when the silence stretches and jonghyun's hands on the new sheets go still, she clicks her tongue at him. 'i'm talking to you!' she tells him. ' _and_ you're slacking on work.'

****

jonghyun shoots her a lazy smile. 'i was too busy thinking about you.'

****

'don't be gross,' gwiboon retorts. she stalks over and lifts the sheet from his hands, fitting it onto the mattress herself. he hovers behind her and as she stands back up, slides arms round her waist and fits his chin into her shoulder, she reaches up to interlace their fingers and for a few long moments, they just stand there, holding each other.

****

'did you hate me?' he asks quietly.

****

'yes,' gwiboon says. and the lack of hesitance hurts a little. 'did you hate _me_?' she asks back.

****

'yes,' jonghyun replies, returning it with quiet truth.

****

'i'm sorry,' jonghyun says to the ensuing silence.

****

'you shouldn't need to apologize for being what you are,' gwiboon responds.

****

'i'm sorry for not making this easier on you,' he says, words falling into her hair. 'i'm sorry for not being more aware. i'm sorry i let you run and didn't follow."

****

there's a pause then gwiboon smiles wonderingly. "you're so beautiful and kind and perfect and you love _me._ sometimes it's so hard to believe." she turns in his arms to look up at him. "i needed to run to know i wanted to come back. you have nothing to apologise for."

****

'i really missed you,' jonghyun says softly, his breath circling her ear. 'thank you for coming back to me.'

****

'i missed you too,' she whispers, tracing gentle fingers over his features. 'thank you for not giving up on me.' 

****

⁂

****

'i'm serious though,' gwiboon says, as they curl up under the covers, picking up her thought from before. 'are you okay about taemin's crush on ming?'

****

jonghyun looks up, surprise rounding out his eyes. 'you silly,' he says, reaching over to tug her close. 'you're worried about that? no, it doesn't bother me. why should it? i had a small feeling ever since they started squabbling over who gets to control the television remote anyway. i think jinki guesses too.'

****

'it's too bad for them that ming is monogamous then,' gwiboon says through the yawn threatening to swallow her face. 

****

'i wonder...' jonghyun replies, his tone thoughtful. gwiboon shoots a sharp look at him, but his eyes are already closed. she traces the heavy shadows underneath them and decides it'll be more prudent to ask the next day. 

****

⁂

****

minho is stupid, taemin decides. he's probably the stupidest person on earth. 

****

stupid, they think, when minho bounds into the house after jinki, talking a mile a minute. 

****

stupid, they tell themself, when minho stops to dart over to where taemin is, to mess up their hair and ask them what magazine they're reading. 

****

stupid, they declare inwardly, when minho finds out it's one of those silly gossip magazines gwiboon brings around sometimes, and teases taemin until jinki pulls him away to the bedroom.

****

'stupid,' taemin says out loud as the door closes, letting their head fall into their hands, feeling their breath stammer in their throat. 'stupid and so unbearably cute.'

****

⁂

****

'is there a reason you keep wanting to come over?' jonghyun asks, about a month later. after taemin had begged to go over for about the sixth time. 'you know we decided on just wednesdays right?'

****

they had decided to go slower, for gwiboon's sake, to let her take the time to breathe and figure out this three way relationship she never really realized she would be in. and taemin feels a jab of guilt. 'i know,' they say. 'is she upset?' 

****

'no, she's not,' gwiboon answers before jonghyun can, walking out from the kitchen with a mug of hot chocolate. 'she figures it's because minho is over there, and as long as she doesn't see you making out with jjong, she'll be okay.' 

****

(that was in the agreement too. mostly because gwiboon thinks watching people make out is gross in general. taemin told her teasingly that it could give her some tips, and gwiboon replied that she had her own techniques, and then they started talking about the _sounds_ jonghyun makes and jonghyun had sputtered and covered their mouths. it was a nice memory. taemin likes it that even if gwiboon flinches, it's only a little bit now, likes it that she knows how to be more honest about her insecurities.)

****

'why are you talking about yourself in third person?' jonghyun asks, reaching for the hot chocolate.

****

gwiboon swats at his hands and places the mug in front of taemin; taemin who hasn't said a single word since the name 'minho' was mentioned. 'i'm right, aren't i?' gwiboon asks gently, turning to them. 

****

taemin nods mutely, letting a resigned sigh slip out from between their lips.

****

'you poor thing,' gwiboon says. 'you know i used to have a little bit of a crush on him too?'

****

' _what?'_ jonghyun squawks from beside gwiboon, when all taemin does is blink slowly.

****

'i _told you_ ,' gwiboon says, turning to poke him in the shoulder. 'it was before i found out he was gay, remember?'

****

jonghyun shrugs. 'i remember. a strong reaction just seemed necessary.'

****

'silly,' gwiboon mutters, rolling her eyes. jonghyun leans over and presses a messy kiss on gwiboon's cheek. 

****

'disgusting,' gwiboon whispers, but the fond smile playing on the edge of her mouth turns the word into an endearment. 

****

when taemin clears their throat, jonghyun shifts guilty eyes to him. 'you want a kiss too?' he asks. and somehow that makes taemin smile. jonghyun and his consistent worry about balance and fairness. 'not right now,' they say. 'let's talk about something that isn't relationships or kissing or crushes.' 

****

'i know what will help!' jonghyun opens his laptop, pulls up the newest horror movie he's downloaded and grins childishly. gwiboon groans into her hands, and taemin laughs, almost merry, almost bright.

****

⁂

****

'where were you?' jinki asks, catching taemin when they tiptoe back through the door later that night. 

****

'over at jonghyun's watching horror movies.' it's mostly true, they aren't lying. that it wasn't the initial intention isn't something jinki needs to know. 

****

jinki raises a single eyebrow. 'you're there very often nowadays, aren't you.' it's a statement that requires no answer, so taemin doesn't give him one. they stand slanted, their eyes averted from jinki, quiet and still.

****

when jinki's fingers tangle into taemin's hair, gently brushing through the knots, taemin sighs and closes their eyes. 'what's wrong, tae?' jinki whispers after a silent few moments.

****

'i can't tell you,' taemin says softly, opening his eyes to meet jinki's frank gaze. 'it's a horrible thing.'

****

'i don't think you could do anything that's really horrible,' jinki tells them.

****

'i could,' taemin replies slowly. 'i really could. you think too well of me.'

****

jinki doesn't say anything, but his hands travel down from taemin's hair to his back and pulls them into a hug. 'you'll tell me when you're ready.'

****

taemin nods into his shoulder.

****

⁂

****

'you know,' jinki remarks, a few days later when they're out for dinner. 'minho asked about you yesterday.'

****

taemin chokes on the spoonful of soup he had stolen from jinki. 'did he?' they ask, facade of uncaring probably ruined by the slight strain of their vocal cords. 

****

'yup,' jinki says, and _he's_ completely calm and unruffled. 'he thinks it's weird you're never around when he comes over anymore; always out with your college friends, or jonghyun, or even _gwiboon_ yesterday.'

****

'she thinks i need better clothes,' taemin mumbles on reflex. that gwiboon had only asked them because a call to minho had gleaned the information of the date isn't something taemin is planning to divulge. gwiboon's sympathy ought to be annoying, honestly, since before this _she_ had been the moping moron, but the shopping trip had been more fun than taemin had expected. they think maybe she could be a friend. maybe.

****

'does she?' jinki asks in astonishment. 'the way you dress is fine to me.'

****

taemin shrugs lightly. 'i think she just wanted to dress someone and jonghyun had to work late.' they hope jinki stops asking questions soon because lying isn't quite their forte.

****

the pause stretches as jinki scrutinizes them. and taemin forces themself to meet his eyes squarely. 'tae,' he says seriously. 'do you hate minho?'

****

this time taemin nearly chokes on a piece of chicken. ' _no,'_ they say, waving the hand with the fork still gripped tight behind their fingers. 'no no _no_. why would you think that?'

****

the triumphant grin across jinki's face is disconcerting. 'so you _like_ him,' he declares. 

****

'i do _not!_ i think he's a perfectly likeable man, yes. but _like_ him, that's not. unless you mean like as in, in a friendly, platonic-' taemin covers their eyes with open palms, the fork falling in a clatter on the plate. it sounds like a death toll to taemin's ears. 'oh fuck it, yes i do. but i'll get over it. i'm sorry. i'm quite possibly the worst partner ever.'

****

'you're not,' jinki tells them. 'minho is lovable, i'm not surprised. i've guessed for a while you liked him anyway.'

****

'i'm sorry,' taemin repeats. 'it'll pass, i'm sure it will.'

****

'maybe you won't need it to,' jinki replies, a grin that is almost smug on his face. but before taemin can ask what he means, he segues into a story of the near fire in the kitchen that day and taemin tells themself to forget it.

****

⁂

****

it takes about three weeks for minho to let himself ask about taemin. he doesn't quite know why it bothers him, that taemin isn't around much; theoretically, just having jinki there is enough, and it is. but he can't erase the thought that maybe taemin's disappearances are more to do with _minho_ than people seem to give credit for. people like jinki, who just shrugs when they got back to an empty apartment and mutters, _guess they had plans._ people like gwiboon, who rolls her eyes -- he could hear it through the phone -- and tells him that _some_ people have lives..

****

but he wants to ask anyway. because it bothers him, that so quickly after getting to know each other, taemin had chosen to flee the apartment every time minho came over. it bothers him. although for the life of him, he can't quite figure out why. after all his relationship to taemin is similar to his relationship with jonghyun, someone linked to someone he's close to, but not someone he too necessarily needs to also be close to. except he kind of wants to. for some reason. minho isn't used to thinking so much about his emotions and feelings. he's a straightforward kind of person, never felt the need to overanalyse and second guess. it's a miracle he's best friends with gwiboon really, she's always too much in her own head.

****

he asks while out with jinki getting a few odds and ends for the restaurant. it's a neutral environment, he thinks. 'how's taemin been?' 

****

he thinks his tone is casual enough. it _must_ be casual because what else could it be? but when jinki looks up at him, there is amusement and mischief in the creases on the sides of his eyes. jinki sees too much maybe, more than most people, understands what they don't say and sometimes what they don't realize.

****

'they're fine,' jinki replies. 'why do you ask?' and _his_ tone is casual. unaffected, blasè. minho thinks he had sounded rather forced in comparison. he doesn't know why.

****

'just...wondering.' 

****

jinki raises a single eyebrow and leans around minho to pick up a bottle of soy sauce. 'do you miss them?' minho doesn't know why there seems to be more implications than that sentence should have.

****

'no?' it's not a statement, and even to himself it sounds uncertain.

****

'do you _like_ them?' jinki asks next, taking over pushing the trolley when minho's limbs seem to stall.

****

'i try to like everyone,' minho says. and jinki smiles a little and shakes his head.

****

'you touch their hair a lot,' he says quietly. 'always messing it up, and i think you do it cos they'll yell, and that makes you laugh.'

****

'you know when we get into the house, and if they're there, you'll make a beeline to them? like two magnets.'

****

minho says nothing, only stares at jinki with something resembling shock and fear intermingled building in his chest. 'think about it, okay?' jinki brushes his hand over minho's hair, and as he brings it down, minho reaches out to link their hands.

****

'this...whatever this is...doesn't bother you?' and jinki shakes his head again, laughing.

****

'no,' he says simply. and minho thinks if he was another person, this would probably be where he'd have kissed him.

****

⁂

****

'why do you need to talk to my boyfriend?' gwiboon asks, suspiciously.

****

'i helped you get back together, gwi…'

****

'are you going to hold that against me forever because!'

****

minho can hear jonghyun's laughter behind gwiboon's agitated exclamations.

****

_i'll talk to him, then we can get back to…_

****

the last words are lost to muted suggestive whispers. gwiboon shrieks and giggles and minho groans.

****

'please consider your best friend's feelings…'

****

gwiboon's voice, when it comes back on the line is rueful with lingering hints of laughter. 'sorry ming, jjong forgot.'

****

minho huffs out a breath and lets it go. he's aware of who he is in jonghyun's life; just the best friend of his girlfriend. they are courteous and cordial when they have to meet, and minho thinks jonghyun likes him enough, but they are not friends. it _might_ of course be linked to how unambiguous minho had been about maiming jonghyun if he hurt gwiboon. he snorts softly to himself at the thought. well, it couldn't be helped that he was protective.

****

he's like that with jinki too. and quite possibly will be with taemin. maybe. 

****

'...hello?' jonghyun's voice breaks into minho's heavy thoughts and from the uncertainty of his tone, minho guesses it isn't the first time he's said the word.

****

it would usually amuse him that jonghyun is a little intimidated by him. usually. but nothing about whatever is going on in his head is usual right now.

****

'is gwi still there?' he asks. and he realizes this is one of the first times he's hiding something potentially important from her.

****

'no,' jonghyun replies, curiosity increasing in his tone. 'but she says she expects to be told soon.'

****

minho lets himself laugh a little. her response is not unexpected. in times of confusion, perhaps she's the one thing he can rely on. he takes a breath and asks. 'when did you realize you were polyamorous?' 

****

the question obviously takes jonghyun by surprise, because he doesn't speak for a few minutes. 

****

'why are you asking?' jonghyun's voice is soft, and there's an undercurrent of _something_ that makes minho think that whatever jinki had seen, jonghyun has seen too.

****

but minho doesn't want to verbalize anything quite yet. 'i just...i need to know,' he says, frankly.

****

the laugh that pops out of jonghyun's mouth is quiet and sad. 

****

'when i was fifteen,' he says. 'i fell in love with my girlfriend's older brother. it would have been easier if falling in love with him meant falling out of love with her, but that didn't happen. he was one of my closest friends.'

****

it's a typical story, perhaps, of friendship that built into something more, except it happened while he was still in love with someone else.

****

'i felt like an asshole,' jonghyun admits, half laughing. 'i felt like a freak. i broke up with her, and cut all contact with him. and if they think of me at all now, they probably still have no idea why.'

****

as jonghyun continues talking, it dawns on minho that this is almost invasive; to be asking such personal questions of someone who, for all means and purposes, he barely knows. to be asking for a reboot of painful memories. 

****

'i'm sorry,' he says, breaking into jonghyun's words. 'you don't need to tell me, i shouldn't have asked.'

****

the carefree laughter that sounds in his ear surprises him. 'don't be sorry,' jonghyun says. 'this will help you.' and barely a beat goes by before he speaks again. 'you're asking because of tae, right?'

****

and minho hasn't even admitted it to himself yet, but he finds the words falling too easily from his mouth. 'maybe, i don't know. i just...i really want to be around them, all the time. and i still really really like jinki, and it feels so crazy that it's happening at the same time.'

****

'crazy?' jonghyun snorts. 'yeah, it does feel like that at first. sometimes it still feels like that now.'

****

'my sister was the only one i told, back then,' jonghyun continues his story. 'and _she_ didn't call me crazy. she just brought me out to meet her friend and his two girlfriends, and i guess that's how i realized i wasn't that big of a freak. still didn't stop her from warning gwiboon when we started dating though...but you already know that part, don't you?' 

****

'she was so optimistic back then,' minho says softly. 'i should have known it wouldn't be that simple.'

****

'is anything really?' jonghyun challenges. and despite himself, minho smiles.

****

'thank you,' he says. 'tell gwi i'll talk to her as soon as i've figured things out. and-' 

****

'don't tell tae?' jonghyun completes the sentence, and if he's laughing a little, minho doesn't blame him. 'if jinki can keep it secret, then i guess i can too.'

****

⁂

****

'so,' jonghyun starts. 'spoken to minho recently?' he grins almost mischievously up at taemin.

****

taemin thinks they shouldn't be blamed for throwing a nearby pillow in his face. 'i don't want to talk about it,' they say.

****

they're in what gwiboon has dubbed taemin's room, formerly known as the guest room. taemin has scattered bits of their life here; clothes, books, dance cds, their spare headphones. 'we should just all move in together,' taemin said once, grumbling about their fragmented life. 'the five of us.' and jonghyun just shrugged. 'let's not scare my girlfriend again.' his smile was soft, but just a little sad. 'mono people,' taemin complained, but there was no real bite.

****

'what do you want to talk about then?' jonghyun spreads himself across the bed, settling in his head in taemin's lap and blinks up at them. like a child, taemin thinks, instinctively running their fingers through jonghyun's hair. jonghyun hums.

****

'nothing,' taemin whispers, smiling down at him. and jonghyun reaches out to trace the side of their face. it's tender, gentle, soft like the way taemin imagines jonghyun's soul to be, and they lean down and catch his mouth in theirs. jonghyun responds eagerly, sliding his fingers up taemin's neck, playing with the fine hairs growing there.

****

'this is fucking uncomfortable,' taemin mutters into jonghyun's mouth, a few minutes into the kiss. 'my neck hurts.' and jonghyun's shoulders shake with suppressed laughter. 

****

'sit up,' he tells them and as they do, he scrambles up to settle carefully into taemin's lap. 'this better,' he whispers, curling arms around taemin's shoulders. 

****

'much,' taemin whispers back, sliding arms around jonghyun's waist, slotting their mouths together again.

****

they don't hear gwiboon's tentative knocks, or her voice through the door, not even the click as the door is swung open. but somehow, they both hear the quiet 'oh,' the louder 'sorry.' and the subsequent running footsteps.

****

jonghyun freezes in taemin's arms. because it's the first time gwiboon has seen them like this, because she said she never wanted to.

****

'go after her,' taemin tells him. because everything is still in its early raw stages, because gwiboon still carries fears too close to her bones, and because they all still have scars.

****

when taemin follows jonghyun out, they see gwiboon sitting cross-legged on the floor and jonghyun crouching in front of her. she doesn't look sad, instead vacant. as if her vision has turned inwards, as if she's seeing things the others cannot.

****

'baby?' jonghyun touches her hand and she jerks, like awakening from a dream. 

****

'i'm sorry!' she squeaks at him. and repeats it when her gaze catches taemin's. 

****

'it's okay.' taemin is the one to answer, because jonghyun is staring at her like trying to find a solution for a particularly complex puzzle.

****

'really?' gwiboon asks. 'i would hate to be interrupted like that.' she makes a face and taemin feels their eyebrows raise.

****

'you're not upset.' it isn't a question, and jonghyun's voice is stunned. relieved, but stunned.

****

gwiboon's gaze wanders back to jonghyun and she giggles. pretty, taemin thinks. so pretty.

****

'were you afraid i was going to run again?' she asks jonghyun, like she's teasing. and when he doesn't answer, she reaches out and runs her fingertips over his mouth. 'i thought i was going to,' she confesses. 'i thought, i wouldn't be able to see you like that. but i wasn't. i'm not. and it's weird, and i don't know what happened, but i think i'm just going to be glad about it.'

****

the silence is broken when a soft snuffling noise comes from jonghyun. gwiboon looks closely at him and when she laughs, it's a bright, happy one. 'are you crying, you silly?' she gathers him into her arms, running fingers through his mussed hair. just as taemin makes a move to turn away, gwiboon looks up, and her smile is welcoming. 'come help deal with him,' she says. 

****

taemin walks over and winds arms around them both, and they think maybe there's one problem that's been solved.

****

⁂

****

the chime of the doorbell makes gwiboon start. and the panic on her face confuses taemin. 'oh no, oh no, oh no.' 

****

'gwi?' jonghyun says. 'baby, you okay?'

****

'that's minho,' she explains, words merging together in her haste. 'i stole some of his shirts to make alterations and he wants them back and he called and said we could hang out and i said, i said taemin's over and maybe we could go to his house instead and he said oh taemin, that's great and put down the phone and i went to your room to _warn_ you but...well yes.'

****

she peeks at taemin from under her eyelashes. 'you could hide in the kitchen? he won't go there. he's bad at cooking.'

****

the sheer anxiety in gwiboon's posture and expression makes taemin want to laugh, even if the name _minho_ is like worrying ants burrowing under their skin. 

****

inexplicably, jonghyun is the only one unphased. 'could you go get the door, tae?' he asks gently. 'it'll be fine.'

****

the look that gwiboon sends jonghyun is incredulous and almost vicious. 'why would you ask them to do _that?_ i may not truly understand a lot of the way you are, but i _know_ what it feels like to see someone you want and know they don't want you.' 

****

jonghyun runs his fingers over her fidgeting hands. 'trust me,' he says. and as he turns to look at taemin, he repeats it, words stressed and emphasized.

****

the doorbell chimes again. 'okay, he'll barge in anytime now,' gwiboon mutters. 'two rings and then he'll let himself in. predictable weirdo.'

****

taemin sucks in a breath, strides over and opens the door.

****

⁂

****

the impatient tapping of minho's foot harmonizes with the erratic beat of his heart. 'i am _fine_ ,' he mutters to himself, as he waits for his slow as _fuck_ best friend to answer the door. trying to pretend that he's completely not freaked out about the fact that he might be in like with two people at exactly the same time has not been easy. jinki had laughed fondly at his agitation, and had patted him on the head, like he was a child, like he was so young. and minho had let jinki kiss him near the corner of his eye. because there had been something worried in jinki's gaze. something jittery. 

****

this will probably be one of the hardest things he'll ever do, and he could try to ignore it. except he wants jinki in his life, and taemin...he doesn't want to taemin to be something he gives up on without trying. maybe they'll fall apart, maybe he'll get rejected gently, maybe he'll fail. but at least he would have tried. and minho is good at trying, good at tenacity, tried out twice for basketball, redid one year of middle school, once practiced juggling until gwiboon threatened to amputate his hands.

****

but this is putting his heart on the line, stepping off a cliff into a virtual unknown. to be with one person is already a complication, to be with another at the same time...it felt like he was entering a different zone, a different kind of world. 

****

'finally,' he says with just a hint of irritation, when the door slowly begins opening. 'anyone would think you were related to a snail someh-' the words clog his throat when he realizes it's taemin and _not_ gwiboon. 'oh, sorry,' he says hastily. 'i thought you were-'

****

'gwiboon?' taemin says, half smile on their mouth. 'yeah i figured.' they don't make a move to let minho into the apartment, instead standing there with the half smile almost falling off their lips. 'how are you? haven't seen you in a while.' the words come out like they're forced, and minho wonders if maybe they're trying to do something he doesn't understand. 

****

'and whose fault was that?' minho mutters, because apparently a side effect of realizing he has a not so small crush on taemin is the inability to filter his words. 

****

it's a strange thing, but taemin's smile turns alarmed. 'you noticed?' they ask. 

****

'that you kept vanishing every time i went over?' minho replies. 'yes, of course i did.'

****

taemin tilts their head quizzically at his words. 'of course?' they ask. 'why of course?'

****

'why _not?'_

****

'do you notice when jonghyun isn't there if you go visit gwiboon?' taemin asks quietly. their eyes are alight with something that looks close to hope.

****

_oh so that's what it's all about._ minho thinks, and maybe he's grasping for threads, but maybe it won't be as difficult as he had thought.

****

'no,' minho shrugs. 'but then, i like you better than i like jonghyun.' he raises his voice as he says this, and he can hear gwiboon cackle from beyond the door, and jonghyun yelp.

****

taemin giggles, actually giggles, and to minho it's an injection of pretty courage in his blood and he thinks he knows the words to say. 

****

'i like you,' he says, as sincerely as he can. 'it scared me at first, still scares me now. but i like you. just like how i like jinki. just like the way you like jonghyun. and i'm terrified. and i'm probably going to screw this up. but there it is. and if you don't mind, i would like to try...something.'

****

the reply isn't quite as immediate as he would have liked, and he watches as taemin's eyes widen, and their mouth open dumbly. 'really?' they ask after a moment, eyeing him suspiciously. 'you aren't...screwing with me or anything, or just being nice. did jinki tell you anything?' 

****

'what would jinki tell me?' minho asks. and it feels almost like he's missing a vital piece of the puzzle, because jonghyun wanders over to peer at him over taemin's shoulder with a smug grin on his face. 

****

'jonghyun looks too pleased with himself,' he comments, before taemin can answer his question.

****

'that's his _i know something you don't know_ face,' gwiboon interjects. her head joins jonghyun's from behind taemin. 'it's the most aggravating face he has.' 

****

her gaze dances to minho, 'is that what you were talking to jjong about that night?' she asks quietly. 

****

'yeah,' minho says, rubbing his eyes with the heel of his hand. he feels exhausted suddenly. 'yeah.'

****

'you're _not_ joking,' taemin says. their voice sounds amazed, like they're entering a dream. 

****

minho smiles, tilting his head. 'do i _look_ like that kind of person?' he asks, but it's teasing, like the way he's always talked to taemin.

****

'no,' taemin says. 'not at all.' and they just smile at him, brilliant and beautiful. from behind them, gwiboon and jonghyun smile too, incredibly thrilled for some secret reason minho doesn't know yet.

****

'uhm,' he starts, slowly becoming squeamish under their delighted gazes. all the trio seem to be doing is silently staring at him with wide grins. 'not that i don't appreciate the smiling, but why is everyone so pleased?'

****

'oh!' taemin says, letting out an embarrassed laugh. 'i didn't answer did i? i like you too. that's why i was avoiding you. and yes, i'd like to try something..too.' it's direct and unflinching and minho feels something heavy fall from his chest.

****

'oh,' he says. 'oh.' and he slumps against the door. 'that's good, right?'

****

'yes,' taemin says. 'very good.' minho reaches out a hand to mess up taemin's hair and they yell and he thinks the world has righted itself again. 

****

not, of course, without a few very specific changes.

****

'can i go in now?' he asks gwiboon, and she laughs, forgetting her presence as a barrier to entry.

****

'i called jinki over, by the way,' jonghyun says as he closes the door behind them. 'you both will probably have to re-enact everything for him.'

****

'no,' minho says.

****

'you know he'll make you agree,' gwiboon says, rolling her eyes. 'so just go with it to save time.'

****

'this is why we should all just live together,' taemin comments. the other three look at them in varying expressions of shock, contemplation and amusement.

****

'never gonna let that one go, are you?' jonghyun arches an eyebrow.

****

'nope.' 

****

taemin grins. and it's the kind of grin of someone who is certain they'll definitely get what they want.


End file.
